Oh John Hughes - how I love thee....

You are the master of teen angst. And for that, I heart you.

• Breakfast Club
• Ferris Bueller's Day Off
• Weird Science (LURVE LURVE LURVE Robert Downey Jr.)
• Sixteen Candles - Jake - need I say more?
• Planes, Trains and Automobiles - "that's not a pillow!" (ok - not a teen movie, but still hilarious!)
• Uncle Buck

and the best of all:

• Pretty in Pink - I heart BLANE - even if "it's not a name, it's an appliance."

Seriously, what's NOT to love about this movie? There's Molly Ringwald - who made all of us girls me in the late 80's bring out our inner designer and I'm pretty sure inspired the Madonna look - or maybe it was the other way around? I don't know which came first - but I was inspired by her that's for sure. I even made some of my own clothes in HS (even though I wasn't from "the wrong side of the tracks"), and unfortunately they didn't turn out as cool as hers.

Oh, how about the DUCKMAN? DUCKY - I mean, how cute and adoreable is he? And his undying love and somewhat stalker-ish obsession with our herion Andie? While today, it would probably earn him a restraining order, back then it was what every girl wanted - right? And, don't you just want to cry when he tells Andie to go after Blane? Seriously, this is the MAN. The Duckman. (bonus points if you remember his ACTUAL name in the movie.)

Ugghh, but for all of our love and adoration for Ducky - there's my repulsiveness and distain for Steff, Blane's friend portrayed by James Spader. Yecccchhhh.. I swear, it was this movie that has turned me off to him forever. Even though he's won accolades and awars for his role on "The Practice" I admit, I've never watched it because of my hate for Steff. Wrong? Maybe. But true.

As I sit here today, not looking for a job on the internet taking a break from CareerBuilder surfing, I can't help but smile as those two crazy kids, Blane and Andie, finally get together at the end of Prom. I still, to this day, want to be Andie and be at the Prom (in my very own designed/and made from my friends 20 year old dress and my dad's cheap prom dress) making out with Blane.

I so wanted to be Andie -not only because of her cool (hand-made) clothes, and the "I don't give a shit about the popular kids" attitude, but also - because she got to make out with the dreamy BLANE (Andrew McCarthey) in this movie. Ok, so BLANE is about the queerist (real word?) name in the whole wide world - but I would just call him B. or maybe he had a normal middle name? Whatever. I loved Blane - didn't you? I still heart him to this day. How excited was I to see him on Lipstick Jungle (sadly, now off the air.) looking as DREAMY and ironically, still a "richie?" Still. mad. that. it. was. cancelled.

Blane, er Andrew McCarthy, reminds me of this boy, Scott (*not his real name) that I was in love, love, love with in High School. (Co-incidence?) Unfortuanately, I didn't end up at Prom with Scott. Or anywhere else for that matter. Actually, I was the Duckman in THAT relationship. But I blame place responsibility of my crush on Scott to Andrew McCarthy. Oh, how I had the teen angst (and - ironically again, ongoing in my life - I mean, for reals, the guy keeps showing up in my life out of the blue all the time!!) for Scott.

I grew up with Scott - our last names were similar, so in the small school that I went to, Scott and I were always seated next to each other, in the same home rooms, if it was in alphabetical order - there we were - right next to each other. But, sadly, we just became friends. That's it. I mean, he HAD to know that I wanted it to be MORE than just friends? Right? See? I am the DUCKMAN in this scenario.

When he went off to college - which happened to be where my best friend had gone the year before and my cousin and aunt lived - I would go down to visit him them. This went on for, well... too long. And, ironically? Lead to five (5) more Scott's in my life. Hmmmm...

Honestly, I really did go onto meet and date 5 Scott's! So, the 2nd guy named Scott - was just a coincidence, but 5? That's just weird. Right?

Oh the drama, the ANGST. Well, gotta run... there re-playing Pretty in Pink again!!!

Fuddy Duddy, Old Lady, GROWN-UP.... sigh.....

It's official. I've become one of those, oh God, I don't even want to say it. Ok, so I'll just whisper it ok? Ready? *Deep Breath* I'm OLD. No, I've become one of those older people. You know the ones, when discussing today's youth, they start sentences with phrases like "in my day" and "when I was his/her age." But today, I did it. I was talking with my SIL discussing my nephew and I said it. I said "his generation just doesn't want to work like my generation did." Dear God and baby Jesus - where in the FFFFFFFFFFFFF did that come from? And, when will the "I used to walk to school every day UPHILL both ways" line come out?

Then, later tonight I was driving to my SIL's house and as I cruised down her street (while talking to my BFF on the phone - see? I'm not THAT old) these KIDS (probably like 14-15ish) were riding dirt bikes or mini bikes on.the.road. (which is ILLEGAL in my hometown) (I know this b/c I did the EXACT SAME THING when I was 15).

Anyway, they were coming right at me, they didn't even pick one side of the road - I had to drive RIGHT DOWN THE MIDDLE! So, as I'm talking with my friend, I yell at these kids "it's ILLEGAL to ride those on the street!" I. am. my. dad. And - this is not a good thing in any way -shape - or -form.

Yeah, they just looked at me like I was some crazy old-no fun having - person. Which is probably what I did when:

I. was. their. age.

Oh God, make it stop!

Turning the economic downturn into an upbeat road trip!

So.... being unemployed DOES have it's perks. For one thing, I have all this time on my hands to do virtually anything (within my limited budget) I want to.

Well, Tuesday - I decided that I wanted to meet the FABULOUS Jen Lancaster - the author of 3 and now 4 of my favorite books:

Bitter is the New Black - Confessions of a Condescending, Egomanical, self-Centered Smartass, Or, Why You Should Never Carry a Prada Bag to the Unemployment Office.
Bright Lights, Big Ass - A Self-indulgent, Surly Ex-Sorority Girl's guide to Why it Often Sucks in the City, or Who Are These Idiots and Why Do They All Live Next Door to Me?
Such a Pretty Fat - Or, Why Pie is Not the Answer.

And her newest book:
Pretty in Plaid: A Life, a Witch, and a Wardrobe, or The Wonder Years Befoee the Condescending, Egomaniacal, Self-Centered Smart-Ass Phase

- which went on sale YESTERDAY at Borders everywhere. And, in Birmingham, MI where I (and my also unemployed blogger palio - Cookie) got to meet and greet with the FABULOUS Jen herself - and got my VERY OWN COPY - SIGNED!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (how cool is THAT?)

I soooooooooooooooo couldn't have done THAT if I was still working, well, without taking a few vacation days. And - it VIRTUALLY cost me NOTHING - How? you ask? Well, because of FORMER job - where I traveled MY ASS off - I earned a ton of hotel points - so I was able to get my hotel room for FREE. Said hotel not only offered a FREE breakfast in the morning, but on Tuesday afternoon/evening when we got there? They were also offering FREE dinner too! How about THAT for the non-working girls?!?

It was soooooo much fun! It was an 80's themed party and I was TOTALLY rocking my BIG HAIR, BRIGHT BLUE Eye shadow and Polo Shirt with the collar TOTALLY FLIPPED UP and of COURSE - my Pegged Pants and Penny Loafers!! I was like, Oh MY GOD - soooooooooo cute!

See, I'll show you:

But wait! There's more! This morning, after our FREE breakfast, we headed to the MOTHER SHIP (Ikea - for those of you that don't read my blog) where I had to return several things that I had previously purchased but have decided that I just changed my mind about didn't want/need them - so I got a GIFT CARD/STORE CREDIT to spend in IKEA (I consider this FREE money - since said purchases were made when I WAS working and had a disposable income). So, I got to do a little shopping at IKEA - and it didn't affect my checkbook AT ALL - so that's a win in my book.

Then, on the way home - we stopped off at Tony Packo's for a YUMMY lunch.

All in all - an UPBEAT and FABULOUS road trip able to be had because of the economic downturn...


Enjoy - and I'm sorry, but you'll have to get your own book to check miss Jen out or check her out at: http://www.jennsylvania.com/

Now... I have to get back to my book!!

Oh, and there was this WAY cute boy (too young for me and maybe just a bit to metro sexual for even shopgirl's taste) that was there and waited in the TWO HOUR LONG LINE to get books signed for his SISTER who lives in California. HOW CUTE/QUEER is that????

I heart him for being so sweet to his sissy....

Jobs that I just may not be qualified for.....

Planting Grass - the shopgirls way......

1. Scratch up the ground to prepare for grass seed

2. Spread grass seed evenly to ensure proper seeding

3. Cover seed with light cover of top soil and hay.

4. Take your time Blocking off area (like the better part of a Sunday afternoon.) to ensure seeds will not be disturbed while grass begins to grow.

5. Explain to two (very cute) dogs that the area is blocked off for a REASON.......

NO, Daisy! I don't think it's cute that you're playing Peek-a-boo with the rope!!

So.... Landscaping? Yeah, it's off the list of new careers....

It’s all about the bennies (benefits that is)

So, it’s been about two and a half months since I was laid off from my job, and sadly I’m still unemployed. But, that’s not what this post is about. Today I want to talk about something that has/is on my mind all.the.time. BENEFITS. Benefits are an important part of any job – I know, I am was a recruiter and I talked these points up during EVERY.INTERVIEW.I. CONDUCTED.

And now, that I’m UNEMPLOYED, it’s ALL.I.THINK ABOUT. Well, that, AND the PAY of my next job (will it be the same or better than my last job or am I going to have to take a cut.) But it’s mostly the benefits. Alright, I think about the Benefits and the “WHEN” I’ll actually LAND a job. Because it would be nice to know how much longer I’ll be sans-job. It would also be nice to get a job while I still have some severance coming it because my bank account could use a much needed boost right about now.

Back to the benefits though. I’ve been doing a LOT of thinking about the benefits. What will my benefits be like at my next job? Because this time around? I’m making sure I get a “great” package.

Of course I’ll want:

· Medical
· Dental
· Vision
· 401(k) – well, maybe – we’ll see how the stock market is doing.
· Stock options
· Flexible Spending Account
· Hmmm.. travel … but maybe a little less than the last job.
· Telecommuting
· Flexible schedules
· FAT Expense Account

Ok… so the last three would be nice to have but aren’t deal breakers.

Now, on the other hand, being un-employed DOES have some benefits. Don’t believe me?

Look what the girls and I got to do today, on April 2, 2009 in OHIO where the weather was a BALMY 70 degrees!!

I was out catching some rays too - even got myself a sun burn too - but I'll spare you the pics - as I'm not "picture perfect" yet. You'd think with all this "time" on my hands, I'd be little miss work out queen - guess my walks are not working the cardio as well I'd like. Guess I'll have to work on that, and well... my tan!

This wonderful moment in the sun with my poochers was brought to you by the state of the unemployed.....

I'm back (and, at warp speed!)

Woo-hoo! I've got my computer back!!! No more sitting in a library that needs to be patrolled by POLICE!! Sheesh - I thought I lived in bo-dunk city, OHIO - not Compton or something like that from the movies... (I'm such a white girl.....)

Anyhoodle - I'm back - for a minute anyway - just to say "hey!" and brag a little about my "computer fixing" experience. This guy that I took my computer too, fixed/cleaned out and added more memory to my computer and has me all current on the latest and greatest software updates and he did it all for under $40 and 2 days!! I just love when I get a bargain AND excellent customer service!!

Seriously - my computer is O.L.D. and if I had the money (and a job) I'd just go buy a new computer - because I really want a lap top now - but for $40 (instead of $500+) I have a faster computer than I did 2 days ago and I got the nicest guy ever to fix my computer. He did the same thing for my dad's computer for only $20!! (mine needed and got, more memory.)

So - now I can upload, download and blog blog blog at the speed of light (well as fast as the internet connection, that I can afford right now, will let me) - all in the privacy and SAFETY of my own house!! I too, have a security system in my house - no gun toting law man -but I have these two security features that will protect their master on command:

Yeah, they look all cute and cuddly - but look at THESE choppers: (BTW: it's the LITTLE puppy that instigates all the fighting with Daisy....)

But, SERIOUSLY? Here's how they REALLY feel about being on GUARD DUTY:

What could be worse than losing your job and the only interaction with peeps is via the internet?

Well, for starters? NOT having your computer for THREE WHOLE DAYS!!! So, I'm sitting here at the library on a S L O W internet connection trying to log onto my blogger account and checking emails and it's literally like watching paint dry.... Seriously I know that the internet is FREE and all here at the library - but does it have to be this SLOW?? And, I know I really have NO WHERE TO BE right now -being jobless and all, but that doesn't mean I have ANY MORE PATIENCE. Oh well, I think I get my computer back tomorrow and woo hoo it will have MORE memory and the guy tells me that it's running a WHOLE LOT FASTER!!!

I wish I could install a memory chip into my pretty little head and make my old lathargic ass move a little faster - wouldn't that be great?? I also wish that I could remove about 100 pounds of useless fat from my ass and my gut, but hey, if I'm dreaming? I'm going to go big. Speaking of big - I'd get new boobs too. Not bigger - just perkier. Whoa - sorry, maybe that was a little to much TMI for a Friday and in a PUBLIC LIBRARY no less, sorry - sometimes I just type the randomness that is in my pretty little head.

Today I'm at a nicer library (not the one in my hood.) Here, people are ACTUALLY quiet. The Library in my hood? Actually has a COP on duty - given the look of the clientele yesterday... I pretty much understand, but seriously - when did they have to have POLICE OFFICERS in the public library? I live in a small town - or so I thought, but I guess it's not a crime free town. Sad - can't even go to the library and feel safe. Or maybe you can - since the "law" is there.

Well this post is pretty much going nowhere - I just felt like I had to get some of these really meaningless thoughts out of my head and since I was sitting in front of a computer (even though it's not mine) I thought I'd unload here.

A better post will follow - I promise...