Zoo B Do

This past Sunday, my new BFF Jerry, and I went to the Zoo here in Akron, OH. I have lived here all of my life and sadly, I've never EVER been to the Zoo - or if I have, I don't remember it. I guess in the past, the Akron Zoo wasn't all that great, but I have to say, for a small town like Akron, OH - our Zoo was really nice!! Small - yes - but nice - Absolutely!! I did feel bad for some of the animals because their "areas" were somewhat small - and seriously these animals should have more room - but all of the areas were done well - had grass, etc. No concrete or just plain cages - thank goodness.

Jerry was an absolute RIOT at the zoo. I wanted to go mainly to take pictures with my DSLR camera that I've had since January and have used only a handful of times. So, Jerry was the tour guide and I was the tourist with her big and bulky camera trying to catch everything and anything on film. As the proper tour guide - Jerry read all of the placards describing each and every animal and exhibit. He even jumped in and helped people find the animals that were hiding!

One of the funniest things - and I swear - I ALMOST DROPPED my $600 camera - was when we walked past the parrots - this freaking bird let out a "call" or whatever birds like this do and I'm telling you that Jerry (and me too) jumped right out of his skin!! Typing this right now, I'm cracking up re-living it! This bird was PISSED and he let us know it!!

Right now at the zoo - there is a JELLY FISH exhibit and it is waaaaay cool! Check out some of my pictures - I'm still a novice with my camera - but these displays were just toooo cool.

We even got to be "hands on" and Jerry got to handle a LIVE Starfish and this made his day!

The end of the day came with a bang - LITERALLY. As we were walking out - I thought we'd seen it all, but there were FLAMINGOS gathered together to wish us off - and - some getting off as well. Seriously, as I stood there taking pictures of all the pretty pink flamingos - there they were - two DIRTY BIRDS doing the nasty for all of us to see.

I knew there was a reason I loved Flamingos.

OMG! Sometimes I can be such a guy . . .

So, tonight as I sit on the couch and watch Project Runway - The Drag Show Challenge (how fun was this episode?) my dog Daisy is curled up beside me and we're just chillin'. Dave calls and is in his Ambien induced state and we chat about his upcoming birthday,what he wants me to buy him, I should throw him a surprise party (um, hello? how can it be a surprise if you're telling me to throw you one?) and blah, blah, blah when all of a sudden - I just let a big old fart rrrrripppp!!!

OMG!!! Seriously - this was no teeny tiny little girly fart. This was a HUGE, Aflac duck coming out of my ass fart!!! My dog - my dog even looked at me with this face that just said "what the fuck was that???" Then, she jumped off the couch like she couldn't even sit next to me anymore because I was so foul.

Dave even heard it - over the phone!!

And you know what? I really don't care - I needed to fart so I just farted. I live alone (and I think we can see why) and I just it rip. Dave has seen and heard worse from me - I mean, I've peed in front of this man - so farting? What-ev.

God - I can be such a guy sometimes!!

I'M BORED . . .

These are queer - I know - but I had to write SOMETHING . . .

Eye Color: BLUEISH GREEN
Hair Color: BLONDISH – LOTS O HI-LITES!
Dyed or Natural: HIGH LIGHTED
Curly or Straight: WAVY – WHEN NOT FLAT IRONED
Right- or Left-handed: LEFT Tan or Pale: PALE-ISH RED
Jeans or Khakis: KHAKIS – UNTIL MY LARGE ASS CAN FIT BACK INTO MY KILLER JEANS

Country, Rap, or Rock: ROCK
Car: 2006 BEATLE BUG CONVERTIBLE – STELLA!
Place in order of preference--T.V., book, movie, music: TV, BOOK, LIVE MUSIC, MOVIE

Your heritage: IRISH
Shoes you're wearing today: SANDALS – UNTIL IT STARTS TO SNOW!!
Your weakness(es): MEN, SHOPPING, DRINKS
Your perfect pizza: GREEK
Favorite color: FUSCHIA
Favorite place: WITH FRIENDS AND DRINKS IN HAND
Goal you'd like to achieve: PLEASE – IF YOU KNOW ME YOU KNOW I’M NOT GOAL ORIENTED!
Your most overused phrase(s): VERY GOOD
Your thoughts first waking up: AW FUCK!
Your best physical feature(s): ALL OF ME – HA HA!!
Your bedtime: MIDNIGHT-ISH
Your most missed memory: MANY
Pepsi or Coke: PEPSIMcDonald's or Burger King: MICKEY D’S
Single or group dates: SINGLE.
Adidas or Nike: NIKE
Lipton Ice Tea or Nestea: FRESH BREWED.
Chocolate or vanilla: CHOCOLATE

DO YOU:
Smoke: SOMETIMES
Cuss: LIKE A FUCKING SAILOR!
Have a boyfriend/girlfriend: NOPE
Take a shower: REGULARLY
Have a crush(es): SURE DO
Think you've been in love: NOT THINK, KNOW.
Want to get married: MAYBEBelieve in yourself: SOMETIMES
Believe in God: YUP – BUT HAVE QUESTIONS
Believe in your government: SOMETIMES
Get motion sickness: SOMETIMES

DO YOU:
Think you're attractive: I ROCK IT OUT BABY! YEAH RIGHT . . .
Think you're a health freak: UM… NO – UNLESS 3 MUSKATEERS, MARTINIS, BEER, PRINGLES AND PIZZA ARE ALL OF A SUDDEN HEALTH FOODS.
Get along with your parents: YUP
Like thunderstorms: HMMMM… DURING THE LAST ONE – I WENT TO MY PARENTS HOUSE – WHAT DO YOU THINK?

IN THE PAST MONTH, HAVE YOU:
Drunk alcohol: THAT QUESTION SHOULD READ – IN THE LAST 24 HOURS . . .
Gone on a date: NOPE
Gone to the mall: YUP
Been on stage: NOPE
Eaten an entire box of Oreos: LOVE OREOS – BUT NEVER EATEN A BOX
Eaten sushi: YUP – THANKS DAVE
Been dumped: NOPE – THAT’S THE BEAUTY OF NO DATES!
Gone skating: NOPE
Gone skinny dipping: NOPE
Stolen anything: A GLANCE. HA HA

HAVE YOU EVER:
Played a game that required removal of clothing: YUP
Been trashed or extremely intoxicated: HMMM… NEVER! HA HA! AND I DIDN'T TALK TO CHRISSY HINES EITHER!
Been caught "doing something": YUP
Been called a tease: YUP
Gotten beaten up: HIT? YES (BASTARD) – BEATEN UP? NO
Age you hope to be married: ??
Number of children you'd like: HAVE MY FUR-BABY ALREADY AND WOULD LIKE ANOTHER.
Describe your dream wedding: ME – SKINNY – IN A FAB DRESS – MARRYING JOSH LUCAS (SWEET HOME ALABAMA) - IT'S NOT THAT FAR FETCHED!
What do you want to be when you grow up: I’M NOT GROWING UP – EVER.

WHAT YOU LIKE IN THE OPPOSITE SEX:
Best eye color?: BLUE OR BROWN
Best hair color?: BROWNISH
Short or long hair: EITHER – AS LONG AS IT HAS STYLE.
Height: TALLER THAN ME. (WHICH SHOULDN’T BE THAT HARD – SINCE I’M 5’ 2”
Best first date location: ?
Best first kiss location: DOESN’T MATTER – AS LONG AS IT’S GOOD

IN THE NUMBERS:
Number of people I could trust with my life: 1 AND MY PARENTS
Number of CD's: 0 – ALL ON iPOD
Number of piercings: ONE IN EACH EAR
Number of tattoos: ONE
Number of times my name has appeared in the newspaper: ??
Number of scars on my body: 6