Seriously?

I'm sooooooooo hating 2009 it's not even funny. And I'm usually all about the funny. So, in January, I lost my job of 8 years and 362 days. Then, my friends' dad died unexpectedly. And today? Well, it is going to be a FUN day - because my dad turned 80 years old on Friday and we're having a surprise b-day party for him tonight. So, that, I hope will be all fun and no drama.
But just now, I just got of the phone with my sis-in-law and she tells me that they have decided to put their dog "Shadow" down tomorrow.

OMG! So this brought on all kinds of emotions - because we all know what kind of dog lover (crazy lady) I am, and then it brought back the emotions of when I had to put my own dog down two years ago. Now, Shadow is a 13 year old Lab and she's not in good health - so I do believe it's the right thing to do - but still, seriously I'm hanging on by the thinnest of threads here and I really didn't need this.

I know what you may be thinking - what are you getting all upset about your SIL's dog - you big baby, but 13 years ago I lived at home before I bought my house and that's when I got Roxy - my lab. And my brother and SIL lived right up the road from my parents house. Everyday, I walked Roxy and we'd go get Shadow and all go for a walk. Roxmeister and Shadow were buddies. And now, to hear about Shadow dying just makes me think about Roxy all over again.

I hate death - I know it's a part of life, but right now I'm one big bag of emotional goo and this isn't helping. I am really lucky because in my lifetime, I really haven't had to deal with much death in my personal life. Aunts, uncles and grandparents have passed - but honestly, I wasn't that close to most of them due to geography - so their loss, while sad, didn't hit me as hard as say - my dog and now, Shadow. I don't even want to think about the thought of losing my parents because if I'm struggling over my SIL's dog - then I'm in trouble. And with my dad turning 80 this weekend and my mom celebrating hers in May - well, I just can't think about it.

This is just one big sappy, gooey post and I don't apologize for it at all - I need to get my emotions out before I burst and this is the only place right now that I can vent. I am trying to get myself together and just when I think it's going to be a good day - I get news like this, or another "rejection" letter from one of the 1000 employers that I've sent my resume to.

I will try to come up with a more cheerful post - but right now, I just don't think I have it in me. So, please... for Shopgirl.... keep writing funny stuff on your blogs because the TV is too depressing and my reality is just a little to real right now....